Monday, August 4, 2008

Biting Off More Than You Can Chew

It all happened when my greedy, wolf-like inner self was unleashed at the dinner table. Devouring everything in sight with gusto, I bit into a chopstick mid meal and heard a cracking sound which instantly tamed the ravenous beast in me. I secretly wished that my teeth were superior in build and strength to the damned pair of melamine chopsticks - but then I was reminded that we humans are fragile creatures - even if it is in comparison to cheap eating utensils.

And so I find myself sitting in the dentist's chair while he does his work on my fangs, probably wondering how I had escaped from the Jungle book. He assures me that its going to be a simple procedure and tells me to focus on the overhead flat screen TV.

My mind wanders to my earliest memory of a visit to the dentist and I recall the free clinic that used to be located in my school as a boy. The "dentist" then was a heavy set woman who used to grunt her orders - ranging from "Open wider" to "Rinse that blood into the basin next to you - you're making a mess". Her dungeon consisted mainly of a dentist chair which seemed to be competing with the dentist on who could inflict more pain on the patient. There were also reams of fat manila folders which I imagined were used to contain pictures of her victims in their most excruciating moments.

The sound of the suction instrument brings me back to the present as I lie in plush leather comfort with soothing piano music cooing in the background. My dentist smiles and tells me to enjoy the DVD being played. "Maybe visits to the dentist aren't so bad after all", I think to myself. I try to concentrate on the episode of "Friends" and its the one where Monica writes a vicious review about a restaurant she ends up working in. Its hilarious and I try my hardest not to laugh with the 3 instruments that were tucked into my mouth at the same time. The dentist mid procedure, along with libraries, funeral services and public toilet cubicles are all venues and situations where breaking into uncontrolled laughter can be inappropriate - and in this case potentially painful.

Before I knew it and just before the credits started to roll, the procedure was complete and I was given a mirror to examine the results. The chip on my tooth was no longer and and I marveled at how painless it all had been. "You may want to chew a little slower next time" the dentist gently reminded. I nodded gratefully, thanked him, and went on my way - eager to wolf down my next meal.

3 comments:

Kenneth August 4, 2008 at 6:19 PM  

Dear Foodographer,

After viewing through your blog, I would say I am very impressive by it. And since KLT has wrote a comment, I might as well give credit to your work as well.

I was amazed by the photos that you took. I am pretty sure it is the camera that you are using which allow you to capture such high quality pictures. As for the writing, we know you are already good (as being a English prize winner in high school). So there is nothing to shout about.

Nevertheless, do continue with the great work. I promise I will visit your blog once in a while…maybe after pete’s wedding (trying to lost some weight before that) as it make me hungry every time I visit. Hehehe.

Cheers,

From a friend only like to eat. Happy snapping & chewing…

Kenneth August 5, 2008 at 5:39 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kenneth August 5, 2008 at 5:43 PM  

hi,

it is me. it is about time for me to go home. so i want to leave some comments for you and your friends to read about...

after talking to you about your iced tea....i did go to a nearby cafe (we called it kopitiamhere) to have a icy cold tea. The drink only costs RM2.50 (equivalent to approximately SGD1).

i did not run away without paying like someone i know...as i calculate it costs less to pay for the drink than to pay the police "bail-out" fee.

anyway, the iced tea that i drank was too sweet for my standard so i only have a few sip. however, in a hot weather like today and the past few days, the drink is very refreshing....

as i am writing this, it has made me thirsty again so i think i will get a iced milo before heading home tonight. for you information, the slogan for our milo in Malaysia is "minumam yang hebat dan kuat". so i better consume as much as possible before meeting you over this weekend...i dont want to get hurt by your bicep....

anyway, i do encourage your friends to put comment and input on your hard work and effort in creating something so XXX....no need to say more.

Cheers,
from your food loving buddy. Chew out...

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